#wcgls - I'm one of 'those people' now

Back at the beginning of August I attended Willow Creek Global Leadership Summit for two days of leadership building, fantastic speakers and I came away with so much.

One of the speakers, Jeff Manion spoke about this "Land Between" concept where we're in this barren wasteland between where we were (Egypt) and where God wants us (Israel). You see in Egypt, we were slaves and this guy, Mosses came along and God, through Mosses, set us free. We should have been happy, but in the dessert, we're getting tired of this Manna stuff and we really want to go back to Egypt where at least there was meet. Yeah, we're promised this great place but for now, I'm burned out and need something.

Now, I hate those people who go to a conference and come back and go "this is what I learned! LISTEN TO ME!! I KNOW STUFF!"

Now I'm one of those people... but I don't care...

I won't get into details but I feel like I'm there, in that land in between Egypt and the Promised Land and I'm going "I'm sick of Manna, I want meat!"

I've been doing a lot of praying lately, mostly Mosses plea in Numbers 11:11-14 “the burden is too heavy for me.”

I'm still in this place where I'm not sure what direction I'm going, but a lot has just happened in the last few days, but what got me in this direction today was a Tweet from kdsrock, a friend of mine in Lynchburg, VA.

"Is your spiritual identity found in your spiritual past? Isaiah 43:18-19" then followed by "Our greatest moments with god and people are right NOW, so be inspired by past wins and learn from past sins, but live right NOW!"

I did want anyone in my situation would do, I looked up Isaiah 43:18-19 - Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.

I saw it immediately: I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland - God has been at work, giving me more than manna, but water to drink from, like from the Nile. Comfort, a reminder that I may be in he desert, unable to carry my burden but God will provide what I need, on His time and when He shuts a door, he opens ten others.

Grace and Peace,
Jesse

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I'm Sorry that I'm Such a Horrible Person

I find myself complaining a lot, instead of doing, so I've decided to make a change about that. If I'm going to complain, I'm either going to take a different stance on it or do something about it.

IE: Put Up or Shut Up.

I'm thirty, painfully true, and it finally hit me that I'm thirty, doing what I've been doing since I was twenty... the... same... stuff...

Yes, I'm better at the stuff I do, a bit more knowledgeable, but I can always do better, I can always be better and I can always lead others to do the same.

There's a nice big fork in the road in front of me. Here lays two paths for me to take and neither one I'm happy about. Not because I don't want to do them but because I have to. I'm at a spot where a decision had to be made, a while ago, and it wasn't so now we are paying for it. Decisions not made affect us just the same as those made.

Where now? I'll let you know in time but right now, I need to figure out which path God wants me to take. Both paths are covered in broken glass, barbwire and rusty nails but both paths can lead to things greater than this 30 year old could ever imagine.

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it woke me up

I've had plenty of brainstorming sessions while laying in bed, and I've had so many different thoughts come and go but never had I ever had anything wake me from that twilight feeling and drive me to type before.

God is good.

So what drove me out of my bed at midnight?

Love.

That's it.

Love.

Every kind of love. I love my family as I should and I love my community but I should love my community like I love my family because we are family, we are all God's children and that makes us family. We're in this together, as a family.

There's been this idea rolling around in my head for years. It originally came to me after seeing Godspell at a local high school. That very next day, in 12 hours I penned what would be my first and last musical. I wrote a musical based on Michael W. Smith's music called 'A Love Like No Other'.

It told the tale of love in different stages, angles and in the end, the everlasting, healing, perfect love of God. Now, this was all done with Mr. Smith's music as a backdrop, which I sincerely apologize for right this moment for that lapse of judgment. It's not because his music couldn't handle being a musical production, it was just that I was highly unqualified to write it.

This suddenly ties in to that thought: love. Why do we do the things we do? Love. Jesus died for us and it was because God loved us so much He hung His own Son on a cross from us.

I'm underselling this statement, mainly because I'm half asleep, but we are built to love. Love one another, love our neighbors, love our God, love our enemies. Love. We are told to love, and by doing the things we love, for other people we love, it's a whole circle of "Kum-bi-ya" that would make the normal person sick but we're not normal, we're God's people who have a higher calling than normalcy. We have a calling to love without motive, without agenda, without love or anything in return.

We're to love each other more than we love ourselves, and in that, Rob Bell I'm sorry to you now: and in that, love wins.

I see it now and I'm not sure why other than my own ignorance of those around me whom I think I can't love or I shouldn't love that kept me ignorant of it all before but it's there now: love.

I think this midnight sermon idea is neat, maybe tomorrow night I'll write the one that's been brewing called "to those of the least..."

Goodnight and God Bless,
Jesse

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Global Leadership Summit Entry 0 - #wcagls

I'm currently sitting in my PA hotel room coming down off the days events and while I'm planning on doing a post on the full events of the week, I'm going to unload with a few random thoughts I had during the day, mainly observational things.

There's been a lot covered in such a little time already and being able to reflect latter is going to be awesome but right now, my ipod dead, I can reflect on observational things a bit but I've said that already. This church is huge, stadium seating, an atrium, bookstore, a coffee café, courtyard, see, huge. They have wings, and not the chicken kind, but the building kind. A west wing cafeteria, which may or may not be a direct reference to the TV show. I haven't asked.

I am curious, though, about the stadium seating. The seats have this space, purposely built mind you, for a bible. Yes, it's a church, and churches should have bibles but to build your chairs with that in mind blows mine to bits. If they had fold down tables on the back al la planes, it would be like heaven!

I question what this church, in the middle of Lancaster, does outside its own walls that they can look at this building and thinks it works. The more I wonder about my direction, the less I want this kind of church (which just means God will probably give me one because He knows my strengths). Yeah, it all looks great to a new comer but what does their soul look like? Does God have a purpose for this kind of church? How could we use a reverse view of this über church to mold a more realistic home church?

I also have an issue of charging for the tools to go and do, or offer a "summit discount" of two bucks and expect me to get excited about it.

I had picked up a few of the 'resource' books on 'sale' outside the auditorium and read something that I've read before but for some odd reason it stuck with me this time. That prayer is communication with God and that people have different ways of communication, and that while some people pray in private settings, others pray with music, writings, poetry, songs, paintings, etc.

It's such an obvious thing that we all miss. You can't tell me that my writing isn't prayer because that's all it is - prayer. No more, no less and if you think otherwise, you're missing the point. My prayer is different than your prayer but as long as it's prayer to God, then it's prayer is as prayer does.

You put this label on prayer as this or that, you're placing labels on yourself and putting God in a pocket. This idea that prayer is more than bowed head, closed eyes, you begin to remove the label of what prayer has to be, you start unwrapping other concepts too. Like what? How about music isn't the only form of worship as starters?

One last thought: what would a true digital church look like and how could something like that be effective in the digital age of social networking?

Grace and Peace,
Jesse

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